Uhm yeah, lyrical epiphany pretty much?


So, I just opened a new page in my text editor and started typing and this is the result. It’s just the plain truth, not always worded perfect, but it’s pretty much exactly what I feel at the moment. It’s like a picture of my mind. Crazy thing. It’s also crazy long, but I had a lot to say. So, here:

I carry this letter with me
my last piece of hope
this one where you told me to hold on
all I need is a smile of you
never seeing you in reality
I preserved in my head
right on time
right before you did run away

you wrote that we’re going through hard times
who knows that better than me?
I’ve been through it all, with you, together
we’ve been through so much shit
we’ll never be separated again
and if not in reality
then in my head
doesn’t matter to me, where we are together

you told me so often that you love me
that I’m the only one
I wondered if its true, you told me to trust you
I still do, still thinking that everything will be alright
you thought that I hate you
I would have every right to
I don’t do,
cause I love you

that’s what love is about, right?
forgiving those who we love
we tell them it’s okay, we suck it up
for the sake of being happy, we suffer for each other
I did, did you? you did, did I?
I still do, but I swear it’s worth every damn tear
I know this is just another test
I have to pass to be with you

and god dammit, I can do this
I swear man, I’ve been through tougher stuff than this
I’m sure I make it, but will you?
I’d be there for you, but I know you don’t know that
you think that I’d leave you the second I know about him
but I’m not like him, I know what you’re have to do
I got your back sister, I hope you remember that if you have to
you thought that I hate you?
your right, I’d have every right to

but I don’t do, didn’t even try it
never even thought about it
there is no need to, cause I love you
you know better than me that all he wants is to fuck you
and the second he gets what he needs he will be gone
you’ve been through this
I’m the only one for you, you know this
and you’ll come back, I’m sure, one day

I carry this letter with me,
my last piece of hope,
the one where you told me to hold on
I thought we’ve been through
turns out were not, even I can be wrong
and all I have left of you, is a piece of paper
and the smell of your perfume in the shirt you wore
when you slept in my bed, in my arms, and now in my head

you told me that you love me, so many times
you told me that I’m the only one
I don’t know if I’m crazy
but I hold on
you thought that I hate you
I would have every reason to
but I don’t do
cause I love you

that’s what love is about, right?
forgiving those who we love
we tell them it’s okay, we suck it up
for the sake of being happy, we suffer for each other
I did, did you? you did, did I?
I still do, and man maybe I’m crazy
but I’m sure it’s worth every damn tear
cause you’ll be back in no time

I’m sure you just cant tell me
and that’s just what you need to do
I do what I need to do, I hold on
even if I’m lying to myself, I know
in the end it will have been worth every damn tear
and that I would have never been me if I didn’t try it
It’s only a small piece of hope, but maybe it’s real
I don’t know it, don’t want to know it

cause it’s all I got, it’s me
it’s the flame that keeps me warm when I sink knee-deep in snow
it’s the torch that glows bright and guides me through the dark
it’s the spark that ignites my thinking, every morning
I would be incomplete without you
and that’s why I hold on
man, call me crazy but
I’m sure in the end it will be worth every damn tear

I carry this letter with me
my last piece of you
the one where you told me to hold on
I didn’t know it then but I could have seen it in your eyes
you told me it could be months, a year
but every time I feel like giving up
I remember those words you set in my ear
I’d be the only you’d have kids with

No one can really understand me
my friends are going crazy
they see me laughing when I should be crying
maybe they think I’m lying
who knows, who cares, I’m me
I carry my hope with me
it’s the thing that makes me smile
every time I want to cry

you told me that you love me, so many times
you told me that I’m the only one
I don’t know if I’m crazy
but I hold on
you thought that I hate you
I would have every reason to
but I don’t do
cause I love you

even if you don’t know, even if were not talking
damn I hope you know that I’m still the same
that I’ll be there for you if you call me
damn, sister, I got your back
you thought that I hate you
and I would have every reason to
but I don’t do
cause, damn, I love you.

Sebastian

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About Sebastian

I am.
This entry was posted in Lyrics, Poems, Stuff. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Uhm yeah, lyrical epiphany pretty much?

  1. summermoon says:

    well.. you’re right , it’s crazy long ;)..but well some things cannot be said in one line.
    one can feel your hope reading the poem… this patient hope…guess there are just a few people who have this ability…too few ;).
    i hope you two will get a “some day…”

    “all i have left of you is […] the smell of your perfume in the shirt you wore
    when you slept in my bed, in my arms, and now in my head”
    i love these lines .. that she sleeps in your head now.. nice metapher =).. so peacefully

    well, keep on doing your own thing ;) it’s great to read about it

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